tomlind
Well-known member
ajclockga":1zg3zlwq said:
Thats right! On Mythbusters, they proved you could skin an airplane with Duct tape and it would fly...just think of the uses we could come up with for our 'Wings!.. :smilie_happy:
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Thats right! On Mythbusters, they proved you could skin an airplane with Duct tape and it would fly...just think of the uses we could come up with for our 'Wings!.. :smilie_happy:
riff raff":27fqysyz said:
Been there, Done that. :doh: :doh: :doh: :whistling: :whistling: :hihihi:
roncar
Well-known member
No tools explained is complete without a translation of the terms used in your Clymer manual.
Clymer translations,
Clymer: Rotate anticlockwise.
Translation: Clamp with visegrips then beat repeatedly with hammer
counterclockwise.
Clymer: This is a snug fit.
Translation: You will skin your knuckles!
Clymer: This is a tight fit.
Translation: Not a hope in hell, bucko!
Clymer: As described in Chapter 7...
Translation: That'll teach you not to read through before you start;
now you are looking at scary photos of the inside of a gearbox...
Clymer: Pry...
Translation: Hammer a screwdriver into...
Clymer: Undo...
Translation: Go buy a BIG can of WD40...
Clymer: Retain small spring...
Translation: "Jeez what was that, it nearly took my eye out!"
Clymer: Press and rotate to remove bulb...
Translation: "OK - that's the glass part off, now use some good
pliers to dig out the base...
Clymer: Lightly...
Translation: Start off lightly and build up till the veins on your
forehead are throbbing...
Clymer: Routine maintenance...
Translation: If it isn't broken... it's about to be!
Clymer: One spanner rating.
Translation: Your mother could do this... so how did you manage to
botch it up?
Clymer: Two spanner rating.
Translation: Now you may think that you can do this because two is a
low, tiny, little number... but you also thought the wiring diagram
was a map of the Tokyo underground.
Clymer: Three spanner rating.
Translation: OK - but don't expect us to ride in it afterwards!
Clymer: If not, you can fabricate your own special tool like this...
Translation: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Clymer: Compress...
Translation: Squeeze with all your might, jump up and down on, swear
at, throw at the garage wall, then search in the dark corner of the
garage for while muttering "Piece of Sh@t" repeatedly under your
breath.
Clymer: Inspect...
Translation: Squint at really hard and pretend you know what you are
looking at, then declare in a loud knowing voice to your wife, "Yep,
as I thought, it's broke!"
Clymer: Carefully...
Translation: You are about to cut yourself.
Clymer: Retaining nut...
Translation: Yes, that's it, that big spherical blob of rust.
Clymer: Get an assistant...
Translation: Prepare to humiliate yourself in front of someone you
know.
Clymer: Turning the engine will be easier with the spark pugs removed.
Translation: However, starting the engine afterwards will be much
harder. Once that sinking pit of your stomach feeling has subsided,
you can start to feel deeply ashamed as you gingerly refit the spark
plugs.
Clymer: Refitting is the reverse sequence to removal.
Translation: But you swear in different places.
Clymer: Prise away plastic locating pegs...
Translation: Snap off...
Clymer: Using a suitable drift...
Translation: The biggest nail in your tool box isn't a suitable drift!
Clymer: Apply moderate heat...
Translation: Placing your mouth near it and huffing isn't moderate
heat.
Clymer: Index
Translation: List of all the things in the book but the thing you want
to do!
Clymer translations,
Clymer: Rotate anticlockwise.
Translation: Clamp with visegrips then beat repeatedly with hammer
counterclockwise.
Clymer: This is a snug fit.
Translation: You will skin your knuckles!
Clymer: This is a tight fit.
Translation: Not a hope in hell, bucko!
Clymer: As described in Chapter 7...
Translation: That'll teach you not to read through before you start;
now you are looking at scary photos of the inside of a gearbox...
Clymer: Pry...
Translation: Hammer a screwdriver into...
Clymer: Undo...
Translation: Go buy a BIG can of WD40...
Clymer: Retain small spring...
Translation: "Jeez what was that, it nearly took my eye out!"
Clymer: Press and rotate to remove bulb...
Translation: "OK - that's the glass part off, now use some good
pliers to dig out the base...
Clymer: Lightly...
Translation: Start off lightly and build up till the veins on your
forehead are throbbing...
Clymer: Routine maintenance...
Translation: If it isn't broken... it's about to be!
Clymer: One spanner rating.
Translation: Your mother could do this... so how did you manage to
botch it up?
Clymer: Two spanner rating.
Translation: Now you may think that you can do this because two is a
low, tiny, little number... but you also thought the wiring diagram
was a map of the Tokyo underground.
Clymer: Three spanner rating.
Translation: OK - but don't expect us to ride in it afterwards!
Clymer: If not, you can fabricate your own special tool like this...
Translation: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Clymer: Compress...
Translation: Squeeze with all your might, jump up and down on, swear
at, throw at the garage wall, then search in the dark corner of the
garage for while muttering "Piece of Sh@t" repeatedly under your
breath.
Clymer: Inspect...
Translation: Squint at really hard and pretend you know what you are
looking at, then declare in a loud knowing voice to your wife, "Yep,
as I thought, it's broke!"
Clymer: Carefully...
Translation: You are about to cut yourself.
Clymer: Retaining nut...
Translation: Yes, that's it, that big spherical blob of rust.
Clymer: Get an assistant...
Translation: Prepare to humiliate yourself in front of someone you
know.
Clymer: Turning the engine will be easier with the spark pugs removed.
Translation: However, starting the engine afterwards will be much
harder. Once that sinking pit of your stomach feeling has subsided,
you can start to feel deeply ashamed as you gingerly refit the spark
plugs.
Clymer: Refitting is the reverse sequence to removal.
Translation: But you swear in different places.
Clymer: Prise away plastic locating pegs...
Translation: Snap off...
Clymer: Using a suitable drift...
Translation: The biggest nail in your tool box isn't a suitable drift!
Clymer: Apply moderate heat...
Translation: Placing your mouth near it and huffing isn't moderate
heat.
Clymer: Index
Translation: List of all the things in the book but the thing you want
to do!
ajclockga
Well-known member
Dont forget the bucket.It useful for sitting on and scratching your head because there was a pic left out of what need.Also useful for putting those parts in that you cant find a place for them to go that was in the pic left.Easy way to find where those parts went,Start bike,ok runs.Ride bike,ok it moves,Look for parts falling off in mirror's.........Ok none yet....................Three weeks later on a ride in front of all your friends umpteen miles from home..........You start looking like the old AAMCO comercial.Thats why that bobby pin was supposed to go there.
