- Joined
- Dec 3, 2009
- Messages
- 9,284
- Reaction score
- 330
- Location
- Duncanville, Texas
- My Bike Models
- 1981 GL1100 Innerstate("The Turd")SOLD!!, 1996 GL1500 Innerstate
Let's see if I can blow this forum up first.... :mrgreen:
A guy gets a call from the police telling him his house was robbed, that the offenders had also consumed all of his beer and had raped his wife. A moment of silence passes and the guy says, “I can’t believe they ****** my wife after only five cans!”
Got this text from my brother recently. It read. “Can I stay at your house for a while? My missus kicked me out after she caught me measuring my cock. It just reaches the back of her sister’s throat!”
I was shagging this sheila over her kitchen table when we heard the front door open. She said, “It’s my husband! Quick, try the back door!” Thinking back, I really should have legged it, but you don’t get offers like that every day.
I just got out of jail. I got locked up for punching the **** out of this bloke at a party. In my defense when you hear an Arab counting down from 10, your instincts kick in.
My wife just came in to me and said, “I don’t know if I am coming or going.” I said to her, “Judging by the look on your face, you’re going – ‘cos when you’re coming you look like a ******* Down Syndrome kid trying to whistle!”
I saw a fortune teller the other day. She told me I would come into some money. Last night I rooted a sheila called Penny – spooky or what?
The missus asked me, “When you’re on a boys only trip away do you think about me?” Apparently “Only to stop myself coming too quickly” wasn’t the right answer.
My wife is pissed off with me again. I crept into the bedroom last night and swapped her tampon for a party popper. No sense of humor.
What’s the difference between a refugee and ET?
ET looked better, smelled better, learned English, didn’t claim benefits, had his own ******* bike and wanted to go home!
A guy gets a call from the police telling him his house was robbed, that the offenders had also consumed all of his beer and had raped his wife. A moment of silence passes and the guy says, “I can’t believe they ****** my wife after only five cans!”
Got this text from my brother recently. It read. “Can I stay at your house for a while? My missus kicked me out after she caught me measuring my cock. It just reaches the back of her sister’s throat!”
I was shagging this sheila over her kitchen table when we heard the front door open. She said, “It’s my husband! Quick, try the back door!” Thinking back, I really should have legged it, but you don’t get offers like that every day.
I just got out of jail. I got locked up for punching the **** out of this bloke at a party. In my defense when you hear an Arab counting down from 10, your instincts kick in.
My wife just came in to me and said, “I don’t know if I am coming or going.” I said to her, “Judging by the look on your face, you’re going – ‘cos when you’re coming you look like a ******* Down Syndrome kid trying to whistle!”
I saw a fortune teller the other day. She told me I would come into some money. Last night I rooted a sheila called Penny – spooky or what?
The missus asked me, “When you’re on a boys only trip away do you think about me?” Apparently “Only to stop myself coming too quickly” wasn’t the right answer.
My wife is pissed off with me again. I crept into the bedroom last night and swapped her tampon for a party popper. No sense of humor.
What’s the difference between a refugee and ET?
ET looked better, smelled better, learned English, didn’t claim benefits, had his own ******* bike and wanted to go home!
